I had to save this article because there's SO MUCH to dive into.
I've been having intrusive thoughts about some women who bullied me a few years ago and have been so angry that I can't get over it. This was a friend group, not a workplace situation. I want to move on an wish them well but I find myself wishing them not-well.
I will be diving into your final article and will let you know if it helps. I really appreciate this.
Thanks for reading Elizabeth. It’s horrible that they still haunt you when you want peace. My article on how to get closure when you can’t move on might really help you identify one strategy that can support this needed ending and closing of this chapter.
Damn Nathalie - this kinda causes distress because I fit a lot of the criteria for being at risk of becoming a bully. I don’t trust easily and I find myself constantly looking for what the hustle might be. I got a little anxiety going all of a sudden!
Also, I’ve read numerous studies that claim that bullies receive a dopamine reward that’s almost analogous to cocaine when they’re especially successful at cruelty. What’s your take on that? Valid / not valid?
It sounds like you’ve identified some areas of vulnerability which is a good thing because you also have your discernment on. The next step to reduce the suspicion level is to notice qualities that make the other person trustworthy AND untrustworthy. This brings balance and a more realistic perspective on the individual so you can adapt your expectations to what is reasonable.
That makes sense. I feel like that’s a really humanizing outlook to take as well - like recognizing the individual trees that make up the forest. Thank You!
I had to save this article because there's SO MUCH to dive into.
I've been having intrusive thoughts about some women who bullied me a few years ago and have been so angry that I can't get over it. This was a friend group, not a workplace situation. I want to move on an wish them well but I find myself wishing them not-well.
I will be diving into your final article and will let you know if it helps. I really appreciate this.
Thanks for reading Elizabeth. It’s horrible that they still haunt you when you want peace. My article on how to get closure when you can’t move on might really help you identify one strategy that can support this needed ending and closing of this chapter.
i’m planning to read it today, thank you Nathalie!
The fact that bullies are repeat offenders, I would suggest that the behaviour is driven by addiction power
Damn Nathalie - this kinda causes distress because I fit a lot of the criteria for being at risk of becoming a bully. I don’t trust easily and I find myself constantly looking for what the hustle might be. I got a little anxiety going all of a sudden!
Also, I’ve read numerous studies that claim that bullies receive a dopamine reward that’s almost analogous to cocaine when they’re especially successful at cruelty. What’s your take on that? Valid / not valid?
Anyone receives a dopamine reward when they’ve done something that makes them feel powerful, especially after feeling powerless.
So can bullying become addictive?
It sounds like you’ve identified some areas of vulnerability which is a good thing because you also have your discernment on. The next step to reduce the suspicion level is to notice qualities that make the other person trustworthy AND untrustworthy. This brings balance and a more realistic perspective on the individual so you can adapt your expectations to what is reasonable.
That makes sense. I feel like that’s a really humanizing outlook to take as well - like recognizing the individual trees that make up the forest. Thank You!