How to prevent giving the Social Injustice Warrior access to your network
Blocking access to network infiltration
I’ve been interested in the reporting about the attempt to dismantle DEI initiatives from higher education institutions, such as Ivy league universities, from both the political left and right perspectives.
I came across work from James Lindsay about spotting the pattern of Woke infiltration on X and saw parallels between his description and my description of how bullies come into and stay in power because of their active and passive enablers.
I appreciate frameworks that describe a recurring pattern in different social spheres even if I’m uninterested in the author’s politics. Before some of you run for the hills because you’re not a fan of his work and political views (or even you are a fan), this piece is inspired by his framework based on entryism and not an analysis of his work.
I have witnessed and heard testimonies about this process of leadership replacement in friend groups, social media/audio groups, spiritual communities, gaming communities (h/t
) non-profit organisations, in academic departments and Zimbabwe (described by ) by individuals/group who forced their way in, diverted the group’s direction, overthrew leadership and destroyed what took years to build in a short period of time.Unless you’re new to my work, you already know I like to describe the seemingly invisible, subtle interpersonal dynamics and domination tactics that precede power struggles. If you’re looking for writers on mostly overt narcissistic behaviours in individuals, I recommend writers
and on this platform.This piece is going to focus on STEP 1 - Demand Access of the infiltration process whereby an individual with a need for power gains access to a social group, community or an institution without force to produce a similar outcome as described above in your community, organisation or institution.
Revisiting the Social Injustice Warrior
I introduced the Social Injustice Warrior archetype as someone who leverages communal narcissism traits to exploit a more vulnerable or perceived disadvantaged group by ‘saving them’ from systemic oppression or oppressive movements. They tend to be from middle or upper class backgrounds who believe they are benevolent allies but the effect of their efforts benefits them and disempowers their Chosen group of victims.
Communal narcissism, a subtype of overt narcissism, is associated with someone who is often charismatic and engaging, and who believes they are benevolent - fair, just, compassionate, generous, helpful, concerned for the wellbeing of others and the preservation of communal values, but is unable to put those behaviours into practice to have the intended impact. This person can feel entitled to self-anoint as an authority on a specific issue or the needs of a chosen vulnerable group to employ communal narcissism to gain social capital and elevate their social status.
These behaviours are present in humanitarians, medical professionals, activists, white saviours, therapists, yoga teachers, spiritual and religious community leaders, charity founders, influencers and social justice warriors who exploit their chosen group in need on their mission to save the world. This person believes they are improving the situation of a target group who is more vulnerable or disadvantaged to them while using their activities to elevate themselves in their institution or community.
Social Injustice Warriors are often associated with subversive academic activists. They can also be credentialed individuals who shunned academic institutions or corporate settings they found restrictive and dogmatic to create their own spiritual, healing, wellness and therapeutic communities (that tend to become restrictive and dogmatic).
I want to focus on the educated do-gooders because they are often perceived as safe, wise, ethical and therefore more advanced compared to those who believe they are just beginning their personal development journey, and who grant these folks access to their personal lives and networks. Their oppressed group aren’t the downtrodden and underprivileged - they are the professionals like them, doing the jobs they once had and feeling stuck in their life.
Tactics altruistic Social Injustice Warriors use to indicate credibility and trustworthiness
Here’s a scenario:
You’re part of an interest group that focuses on healing, wellness and spirituality. This group meets live in online forums to discuss specific topics, meditate and host speakers who have expertise in specific topics and therapeutic methods. Mostly, you’re interested in the informal online hangouts where random people turn up and the conversations feel deep and meaningful, and you come away with new insights about yourself and your process of growth. It seems like a really supportive space whose members are thirsty to learn. You appreciate that everyone conducts themselves well despite the absence of a clear leader.
You’re having one of those awesome conversations with a few people when a new person enters and starts to contribute their thoughts to the discussion. You’ve encountered this person before in other forums promoting their upcoming live event. You’re intrigued because they seem to have a large following and you’ve been impressed by how confidently they spoke about concepts you’ve just started to learn about. Now they’re in a small, intimate gathering with you and you want to take this opportunity to hear more from them.
You noticed:
They are comfortable speaking for a long period of time about what they want in the company of strangers.
They are interesting storytellers and focus on themselves, their (spiritual/healing) experiences and speak openly about wisdom they acquired from mystical experiences, and claim they are sharing exclusive, secret knowledge.
They evade direct questions and speak about experiences that gave them knowledge about the question.
When asked about personal development strategies, they casually drop names of public figures or notable people in the field at events they either hosted or attended who personally endorsed their strategies, without actually mentioning what the strategies are.
They mention how much more peace and fulfilment they have now compared to when they worked in corporate/finance/academia/clinical settings.
They are inviting and with an air of untouchability.
They use a word salad of complex or esoteric terms that sounds impressive.
They hype events they’re either planning or attending, mentioning names of up and coming people they are personally mentoring and adding to their exclusive network.
They tell fascinating stories of how they were able to alleviate a variety of issues for others, their good deeds and/or how they got named institutions to change policies/practices.
They profess knowledge as a legitimate teacher who has simplified personal growth to an algorithm or a sequence of shortcuts and mentions that their events/gatherings is where the algorithm and other details are shared.
They speak about teachings and practices with condescension except when there is a known practitioner with their own following in the same room.
They mention how they’ve become more selective with the company they keep due to past experiences of people “taking their energy”.
When another participant asked them for advice about the participant’s struggles, they describe what they would do to help them overcome their struggles and then describe how they helped someone else using their process.
You also noticed:
No one challenged them.
No one interrupted them or acknowledged that others wanted to speak.
Everyone praised and fawns over them.
Some expressed gratitude for exposing them to advanced knowledge.
Some expressed excitement about the upcoming events/gatherings and felt lucky to be invited.
No one expressed annoyance that the previous conversation was interrupted, diverted and dominated by someone new to the group.
Questions or doubt about the person’s claims when the person was no longer in the room were shut down by those who fawned over them.
These tactics, intentional or not, alongside the absence of collective resistance, will either make you think this person suffers from self-absorbed narcissism or is really intriguing. To those who are seeking to discover causes to their suffering, going through a transitional phase in life or want to feel powerful, someone like this can be perceived as the answer to their prayers. Being in the same room with them can feel as if something special happened.
People with a high 'groomability' (low groom-immunity) factor need and like excessive compliments, and feeling special from others. They crave attention and affection and are easily charmed and enthralled by charismatic displays of someone who gives the illusion of confidence and authority. Those with high groomability, trust easily and have low discernment. If you call bullshit on or feel deeply suspicious of the behaviours listed above, you likely have low groomability and high groom-immunity because you believe that the person is not what they claim.
How they gain access (how you gave it to them)
When you believe they have or are what you’re looking for - an authority - you’re prepared to follow them, learn from them and open up to them. You attend their courses, seminars and private sessions where they will start to learn more about you, your weaknesses, needs, desires and connections. They will share enough of their knowledge so that you feel inspired to implement these ideas into your life to make those desired changes that you will attribute to them. You feel privileged for the private 1:1 time you have with them (that you paid for) and when they show interest in your ideas, because their guidance feels sacred. You might feel euphoric at times after a profound therapeutic session that will prompt you to become evangelical about their teachings and methods.
Once they have access to you and your psyche, you will feel compelled to tell some of your connections about this amazing person who has helped you so much. You want others to benefit as you have. You might even feel called to promote them publicly within your own network and find opportunities in your workplace to expose as many people as possible to this great person. Any opportunities that align with their ambition that this person can gain from your connections will make them more interested in you. They might even suggest teaming up to work together on an important project based on shared interests ie. workplace wellness.
They will make contact with connections in your network and begin to form relationships with the individuals they believe are aligned with their mission, who have advantageous connections and infiltrate their networks. While their approach doesn’t involve making demands (yet), their altruistic-person-of-importance vibe is sufficient for many people to spill their deepest and darkest secrets in hope of receiving their precious guidance.
If you feel it’s your mission to raise their profile because they are an unknown talent you would like to make known, or that uplifting them also makes you look good, you will feel a sense of responsibility to live up to your promise to and vision of them. They in turn will become more demanding of your time and energy to promote them (step 2- demand accommodation), especially when they aren’t getting the level of interest or engagement they expected from your connections. They will do the same with others in your network until they get higher access into an organisation or institution.
They will have also formed alliances with individuals in your network so that when you start to feel resentful about the unrealistic demands they make of you, you will no longer be able to speak to those connections about it because they are under the same spell you used to be, and will deny or justify anything that challenges their perception of them. In time, others will start coming to you to complain about how demanding that person was or the negative impact their approach had on them or an initiative they took over. Unfortunately, this can negatively impact your reputation due to your association with them and your original claims of trustworthiness.
How to prevent giving access to the Social Injustice Warrior
Be skeptical about those who brag about their accomplishments.
Increase your groom-immunity factor by not needing or wanting anyone who seems important to make you feel special or important.
Do not share your feelings and deep experiences that can be exploited with new people that you meet, even if you feel a soul connection. Trust should happen with time and evidence of the person consistently walking their talk.
Seek valid evidence of their claims from them and those who have worked with them before considering them as a mentor, guide, therapist etc.
Notice how they respond to you asking questions or disagreeing with them. They are unable to engage in a productive discussion if they use a condescending calm voice, shut you down, or use an agreeable placating approach.
See if they continue to show interest in you if you don’t talk about your connections or don’t offer to promote them within your networks.
Don’t give power to any external authority to be THE guide or your saviour, especially when there are conditions that require access to your network.
A takeaway message from this article is that not all politically destructive network infiltrators are hostile. Some seem well-intended and legitimate until after they’ve gained access to you and your connections.
If this happened to you, how did you discover you had given access to an altruistic Social Injustice Warrior that you later regretted?
What did you to deny access to you/your network?
Thank you for reading, sharing, commenting, subscribing and supporting my work,
Nathalie Martinek, PhD
The Narcissism Hacker
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I believe that a common threat to our individual and collective thriving is an addiction to power and control. This addiction fuels and is fuelled by greed - the desire to accumulate and control resources in social, information (and attention), economic, ecological, geographical and political systems.
While activists focus on fighting macro issues, I believe that activism also needs to focus on the micro issues - the narcissistic traits that pollute relationships between you and I, and between each other, without contributing to existing injustice. It’s not as exciting as fighting the Big Baddies yet hacking, resisting, overriding and deprogramming our tendencies to control others that also manifest as our macro issues is my full-time job.
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A woman bought a house in this small town. She taught yoga and led bird walks and drum circles and volunteered for everything. I had just left an abusive relationship and she became my "best friend" - invitations, phone calls, got me to attend a woman's support group with her where she eventually expressed her belief that I deserved the abuse because I did something or other (I didn't stick around to hear her reasoning - which the facilitator was not shutting down) and the only answer was for me to sell my house and move. I was kicked out of her yoga class when I said no. She told me she could no longer be my friend because I didn't want her help. I later saw a photo of her with the abusive ex so I think there are parts to this story that I will never know but I do know I felt uncomfortable about the large way she came into my life and I ignored it. I won't make that mistake again. I trust no one.
Your list of characteristics of the "Social Injustice Warrior" provided an excellent description of an archetype that definitely exists in the alternative spirituality universe. I think my dad was also a Christian version of this archetype. I personally believe he truly did have some dramatic supernatural experiences, but the way he sometimes wielded the authority of these experiences over others to push his own agenda was not great. I recently wrote more about that on my blog: https://astrologybooks.substack.com/p/more-on-the-miami-mall-aliens
My current main slice of the alternative spirituality universe, astrology, has some protection against this phenomenon in that it has a tether to objective reality. Astrologers are human and can have conflict with each other just like anyone else, but ultimately Saturn is either opposing your Sun at the moment or it is not — there is an actual mathematical answer rather than one person's subjective experience against another's.