I wish I had access to this guidance years ago when I was navigating a toxic workplace and the need to exit--but lacked this kind of organizing framework to make sense of it. Tysm for this!
There is a book here...somewhere...Can I add an executive one? If the CEO and head of bus dev suddenly block you from selling new business, your primary source of leverage over the business, then you need to plan your departure stat...always depart with leverage, if necessary, so you can extract severance in an at-will position that is executive in name only.
Uncanny how you capture the stages. It is strangely reassuring to discover that the experience that made you feel isolated, alone, and a bit nuts is actually very common and so predictable as to be virtually archetypal. I’m writing a book about this with memoir as the spine. Thank you for your extremely valuable work.
Literally every single one of those signs were there in neon. Ugh. One thing that I wish were talked about more is the feeling of being trapped because there’s nowhere to go and/or there’s the very real threat that once it’s discovered that you’re looking for an exit, you’ll be almost instantly blackballed in that industry.
After having been in the Digital Technology field for over 20 years, I would add that it may not be your boss who is the primary actor. It may be the CEO or middle manager who is making the plans. You boss may not even know anything about it.
I would also add that it is not always a good idea to quit before you being laid off. Depending on your financial situation and the potential severance package, it is sometimes better to polish your resume and portfolio and just keep track of job listings. Apply to the really good jobs, but don’t necessarily go all in on a job search. It is exhausting to work full-time and conduct a serious job search, so it is not always the wise choice.
Also, your manager may get laid off before you do, and then the situation suddenly changes. That has happened to me many times. Typically, the worse the manager, the higher the likelihood this will happen. Same for if the problem is a toxic co-worker.
You should also be aware of the overall market. In some economic situations, it is really hard to find a new job because supply exceeds demand. In other economic situations, hiring managers are desperate and will lower standards and increase starting salaries.
Obviously, how much you like your job and how well it aligns with your career goal matters a great deal as well.
I entered medical school in 1983, and have observed consistent individual and group narcissism in med school, residency, and private practice over 40 years ... I started studying this personally in the 90s when I saw that it would often intrude into my work life ... grandiosity, hero-worshipping-backslapping, hierarchies of superiority, all to the detriment of the medical care system and to the clinician-patient relationship, and eg used against the physician often by hospital administrations (and opposing medical groups) inventing the false label of the "disruptive physician" in order to scapegoat people for mostly political reasons, misusing "customer satisfactions surveys" against physicians, and MANY other examples ... the constant top-down pressure from payors which is transmitted through the system, via administrations onto the clinicians, and it amplifies the narcissistic acting out ... thankfully I got out of corporate medicine 8 years ago, and now free-lancing in head injury rehabilitation, where I control my quality of care/time, etc ... BTW, presently reading the paper above by Dr. Alex Kennerly Vasquez, interestingly in light of being a frequent observer of the practice of "chiropractic neurology" (and other fabricated niches by medical and paramedical practitioners) in this area, with its erroneous and grandiose claims, this phenomena being pumped heavily by the local chiropractic college, just one of many examples of marketed facades in medicine ...
Right on Nathalie, Dr. Alex Kennerly Vasquez, Ian Nolan, Anna Runkle, James F. Richardson, Colleen Doran, Katherine Brodsky, Hein V, Ambha Roberts, Christopher Sweat, and all. Please see/share our research from Captain Rob Balsamo, Amber Quitno, Captain Dan Hanley, Prof. Tony Martin, Prof. Graeme MacQueen, Dr. Paul Craig Roberts, and others and help us improve it if you can. Thank you!
Agreed and I must endorse your list. I experienced every single one of those. More than 10 years after it all happened late one night I wrote out the entire experience.
This description - every single step - is absolutely spot on, thank you! This is rife in corporate, where managers are hired on the back of 'coffee catchups' rather than skill, and use an existing well functioning department as a showcase for their ill thought through, stressful, ineffective and inefficient 'change initiatve', as a springboard for an utterly unearned near-future promotion.
I wish I had access to this guidance years ago when I was navigating a toxic workplace and the need to exit--but lacked this kind of organizing framework to make sense of it. Tysm for this!
Thank you Rupi! I’m glad it can help people now!
There is a book here...somewhere...Can I add an executive one? If the CEO and head of bus dev suddenly block you from selling new business, your primary source of leverage over the business, then you need to plan your departure stat...always depart with leverage, if necessary, so you can extract severance in an at-will position that is executive in name only.
Absolutely James! Can I add it post pub for my executive readers and credit you?
Yes!
Uncanny how you capture the stages. It is strangely reassuring to discover that the experience that made you feel isolated, alone, and a bit nuts is actually very common and so predictable as to be virtually archetypal. I’m writing a book about this with memoir as the spine. Thank you for your extremely valuable work.
Literally every single one of those signs were there in neon. Ugh. One thing that I wish were talked about more is the feeling of being trapped because there’s nowhere to go and/or there’s the very real threat that once it’s discovered that you’re looking for an exit, you’ll be almost instantly blackballed in that industry.
definitely needs more conversation
Great article.
After having been in the Digital Technology field for over 20 years, I would add that it may not be your boss who is the primary actor. It may be the CEO or middle manager who is making the plans. You boss may not even know anything about it.
I would also add that it is not always a good idea to quit before you being laid off. Depending on your financial situation and the potential severance package, it is sometimes better to polish your resume and portfolio and just keep track of job listings. Apply to the really good jobs, but don’t necessarily go all in on a job search. It is exhausting to work full-time and conduct a serious job search, so it is not always the wise choice.
Also, your manager may get laid off before you do, and then the situation suddenly changes. That has happened to me many times. Typically, the worse the manager, the higher the likelihood this will happen. Same for if the problem is a toxic co-worker.
You should also be aware of the overall market. In some economic situations, it is really hard to find a new job because supply exceeds demand. In other economic situations, hiring managers are desperate and will lower standards and increase starting salaries.
Obviously, how much you like your job and how well it aligns with your career goal matters a great deal as well.
I entered medical school in 1983, and have observed consistent individual and group narcissism in med school, residency, and private practice over 40 years ... I started studying this personally in the 90s when I saw that it would often intrude into my work life ... grandiosity, hero-worshipping-backslapping, hierarchies of superiority, all to the detriment of the medical care system and to the clinician-patient relationship, and eg used against the physician often by hospital administrations (and opposing medical groups) inventing the false label of the "disruptive physician" in order to scapegoat people for mostly political reasons, misusing "customer satisfactions surveys" against physicians, and MANY other examples ... the constant top-down pressure from payors which is transmitted through the system, via administrations onto the clinicians, and it amplifies the narcissistic acting out ... thankfully I got out of corporate medicine 8 years ago, and now free-lancing in head injury rehabilitation, where I control my quality of care/time, etc ... BTW, presently reading the paper above by Dr. Alex Kennerly Vasquez, interestingly in light of being a frequent observer of the practice of "chiropractic neurology" (and other fabricated niches by medical and paramedical practitioners) in this area, with its erroneous and grandiose claims, this phenomena being pumped heavily by the local chiropractic college, just one of many examples of marketed facades in medicine ...
Right on Nathalie, Dr. Alex Kennerly Vasquez, Ian Nolan, Anna Runkle, James F. Richardson, Colleen Doran, Katherine Brodsky, Hein V, Ambha Roberts, Christopher Sweat, and all. Please see/share our research from Captain Rob Balsamo, Amber Quitno, Captain Dan Hanley, Prof. Tony Martin, Prof. Graeme MacQueen, Dr. Paul Craig Roberts, and others and help us improve it if you can. Thank you!
https://michaelatkinson.substack.com/
Sincerely,
Michael
🦖
Agreed and I must endorse your list. I experienced every single one of those. More than 10 years after it all happened late one night I wrote out the entire experience.
Free PDF: researchgate.net/publication/380548008
• Free PDF: academia.edu/118395502
This description - every single step - is absolutely spot on, thank you! This is rife in corporate, where managers are hired on the back of 'coffee catchups' rather than skill, and use an existing well functioning department as a showcase for their ill thought through, stressful, ineffective and inefficient 'change initiatve', as a springboard for an utterly unearned near-future promotion.
You wrote the last 4 months of my job.
1 - 10. In order. Perfectly.
And yup, I walked.